I can breathe again ...

Thank you all so much for the good luck wishes and the lovely comments. They made my day. I am so glad to be part of this community of artsy souls who encourage eachother and sympathize with all the struggles one encounters when trying to make a living out of making art.

About the market: what shall I say ... I'm left with a kind of dubious feeling about it all. Maybe my expectations were too high. The last few weeks, whenever I was in our local shopping mall, I couldn't find a parking spot because of the huge crowds of people running around like maniacs with shopping carts piled high with presents and their hands full of shoppingbags. I've never seen it this crazy before. It bothers me a bit because for me Christmas isn't about presents at all. Christmas for me is about family and spending time together. But, well, seeing as they are this crazy about buying presents and spending all that money, I (maybe naively) figured there would be loads of people at the market with pockets full of money eager to buy everything we all so lovingly and caringly made ...

Hmmmm ....

It wasn't like that at all. I'm not gonna say there were no people. I'm not even going to say they didn't buy anything. They did, but it was less than I expected, both the number of people and the number of sales. Talking to some of the other stall holders that had done this same market before (for me it was the first time), they agreed it was a bit slow, there weren't as many people as last year, and there was a lot of ooh-ing and aah-ing but not so much buying.

And that saddens me a little. In the afternoon, when it was especially slow, I walked around the market to look at the stalls of the other people, and it was so clear that they had all put their heart and their soul into everything they created. So much attention to detail, little loving touches, everything beautifully packed and wrapped for Christmas, reasonable prices, thoughtful presentation. And still .... People seem to prefer buying their presents in the big commercial stores. Presents that are not unique at all, that you can find in every shopping mall in every town. One in a dozen so to speak.

It's a bit disheartening. All the hours of work, all the stress, all the hassle. It makes me wonder whether it's worth it. Don't get me wrong, I did sell some boxes, some small paintings, some cards, some magnets, and I'm really grateful to the people who bought them from me. And we had a real community sense between all the stall holders. But still. I'm not sure I'm prepared to do it again. Because, let's face it, the first thing you want to do is sell your stuff. The community sense is great and all, but at the end of the day you don't want to drag everything home again. You want to have an empty stall and pockets full of money.

I think it's the big dilemma for every artist.  I need to make art, not for the money but because it makes me feel good and I have this urge inside me that makes me want to create, need to create. It makes me happy. When I can't create I have an emptiness in my life that can't be filled with anything else. And I would love to be able to do it all day and every day. But I also need to live. And what better way than to be able to live from what you love doing? Alas, experiences like this make me wonder whether it'll ever be possible.

I don't want to sound negative. I earned back the money I paid for the stall, and some more on top of it, which is more than some of the other stall holders could say. So I shouldn't complain. I met some really nice people and got the feeling I was part of a big family, which felt great. But I couldn't help feeling a bit deflated when I went home.

But when I got home, I found a parcel on the table. Addressed to me, from the USA. Gina, who had won my print in my 100 followers give-away, had sent me a surprise packet to thank me for the print. It was so completely unexpected and such a nice gesture that I got tears in my eyes when I opened it and found her little note and the 2 lovely ornaments she made. Thank you Gina, you saved my day! These little ornaments are going to get a very special place in our home!

Because of the limited amount of time I had in the last week, I haven't been able to show you some other happy mail I received this week. A few weeks ago I was looking at Aimee's blog, and I saw a print that looked as if it was made for me. I knew I had to have it. She even had a sale on in her Etsy-shop at that moment, and offered a second smaller print as a present if you bought one. So I didn't have to think about this at all. And on Thursday I got it in my mailbox. Here's the print that immediately spoke to me:

And here's the one that I chose to accompany it (and it was very hard to choose, so many beautiful things in that shop...):

Isn't it gorgeous!? Thanks again Aimee, for making this art!

And I'm not even finished yet! I realize this post is getting way too long, but I really need to mention 3 more people. Last night I finally had time to read my mail again, and one mail was from Viola, who had bought my calendar and received it this week. She wrote that it would make her wall smile all next year. How lovely is that! Thank you Viola, for buying my calendar and loving it. It makes it all so worth it.

And today I got a mail from Chrissy. She's a local artist who also had a stall at the market yesterday and who was in love with one of my small paintings. She went home with it and wrote me to tell me she was so inspired by that painting that she felt a strong urge to paint when she got home. She finished two paintings that same night and wrote a blogpost about it! You can find it here. Go check it out, she makes beautiful things. I'm very happy to have a lovely print and a card from her as well. Thanks Chrissy, I'm so glad my painting inspired you to make these beautiful works.

And last but not least, Sandra was a stall holder at that same market too! I finally had a chance to see her amazing dolls with my own eyes. She bought my doodle-box, and did an art swap: one of my small paintings for one of her small dolls.  I LOVE it!  It's made of recycled materials and so cute.

I especially love the flowers on her dress, and the bonnet on her head (made from a beer crown). Thank you, Sandra, too, for making these sweet little things and brightening up people's lives.

So I can end this post with a positive note. The most important thing is to do what your heart tells you to do. If you feel the need to create, by all means: CREATE! If you can only touch one person with something you made with your heart, it's all worth it. And the bills? Well, I'll figure out a way to pay them while still keep on doing what I love to do. But for now, I'm going to relax in the knowledge that I have enough stock to last for a while,  and take time to play again and just enjoy. And now I'm finally ending this very long post with a saying I found on Carol's blog:

Let's all do this, shall we? Thanks for visiting! ♥ ♥ ♥ you all!